Sunday, April 10, 2011

Mike Huckabee on The View

     I  caught the end of Mike Huckabee on "The View" Thursday, April 7th.  It caught my interest when I heard him talking about single mothers and child support.  I didn't hear enough to know exactly what his point was so I researched it and found the article in which he strongly criticizes Natalie Portman for having a baby out of wedlock and giving a false sense being a single mother.  I also found, to be fair to him, a second article where he defends and clarifies what he says was a misinterpreted statement by the media.  As I understand it, he was answering a question by the interviewer.  I don't think he was attacking Natalie Portman specifically, but was making a generalization about women in Hollywood flaunting having children out of wedlock.

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     I happen to like Mike Huckabee.  I am a proud Republican and I agree with some of his ideas and things he has to say.  I understand that he meant when speaking about Natalie Portman that women in Hollywood have babies out of wedlock all the time and give a false sense of what it really means to be a single mom.  Impressionable young girls see actresses having children by themselves and  it looks easy.  What isn't usually shown is their nannys and financial status.  It  is a lot easier for them because they can first of all, afford their children, and secondly, can afford all the help they need.  I definitely agree with him on that.  I admit, my daughter and I watch Teen Mom and Teen Mom 2.  I find it a great thing for us to watch together and discuss the reality of what those girls go through.  It is a perfect time for me to talk to her about responsibility and how decisions you make follow you for the rest of your life.  I even find some episodes when the dads are shown a lot a good time to bring my boys in and include them in the discussion.  But, these shows have also glamourized teen pregnancy.  The girls are making money and are in magazines like celebrities. 
       Huckabee stated on "The View" that he believes a better country and government begins with a family unit.  Although, he added women are certainly not expected to stay in bad/unhealthy  relationships.  I agree,  and I think most moms would agree that they would much rather have a whole family unit for their children.  I certainly didn't want mine to be from a broken home, but things happen and the reality is that now I am the norm compared to years ago when it wasn't appropriate to be a single mom and I would have been in the minority. 

     Having kids is hard in the best of circumstances.  Being unprepared financially makes it that much harder.  Huckabee was on the show to discuss the government shutdown and his opinions of where funds could be cut. I think he was talking about how much of a burden it is for the government and tax payers when unwed, uneducated, and unemployed women have babies.  It is a problem, I understand that, but those mothers aren't the only problem.  I am an educated mom, but I was a stay at home mom for years and now don't really know how I am supposed to financially support my kids all on my own.  The mothers are not the problem.  What I would like to suggest to Mr. Huckabee is to track down these "men" who have fathered all of these kids and MAKE them do their part.  I am being completely honest here, if it wasn't for my family, I don't know where me and my kids might be. Thankfully, my dad took me on, but I don't know where I else I would have found a job that would allow me to do what I need to with my kids and in their schedule. The government wouldn't have to give as much financial aid or use as much tax money if they would find these men and make them responsible.  I don't understand why that is not already being  more effectively done.  It seems like a no brainer to me.  Society looks at the women and that is unfair.  I know there are situations where it gets out of control and a mom is being taken care of by the government and continues to have children while living off of welfare.  That's not right, but they aren't having the kids by themselves.  If the government would make these men more responsible, they would take more responsibility in the prevention of those pregnancies. I don't think men are worried or threatened because they know they will be off the hook.  When it comes down to it all the responsibility falls on the mom and the men are almost allowed to flake on their responsibilities. I have been educated more than I really cared to be on just how unfair it is for single moms.  We can't just cut moms off that need that assistance.  I am a taxpayer and I don't like it either.  I could use some of my tax money and put it towards taking care of my own kids, but the kids needing the assistance can't be neglected.  It's not their fault.

        I think we have become way too relaxed in our teaching of morals and are sending a message to our new generation of kids that anything goes. But the fact remains the same, tax payers are raising the children of men who should be tracked down and made responsible. HOWEVER,  I don't think it  really matters if a woman chooses to have a child on her own, gets pregnant before marriage, or ends up in a divorce.  To me, it doesn't matter how you got there, the end result is the same.  It takes two people to make a child.  (Unless, of course a woman chooses to have artificial insemination by a donor, but still that doesn't really count, because she chose that knowing her financial and solo status so I don't really think they are the ones that are drowning our country in financial assistance.  They knew from the get go they were in it alone and wouldn't be getting child support.)  There are two people in the picture that are responsible for taking care of their child. I think Mr. Huckabee needs to take a second look at this and find a way to make the dads do what they are morally and legally responsible to do.   Until then, it falls back on the women.  Most women don't choose to be financially strapped and unable to provide for their children.   I am very blessed and fortunate that I have family to help me out.  My heart goes out to women who aren't as fortunate and are left with the responsibility of providing for their children alone.

     I realize we as a country have to cut government spending in some places.  I really like this idea.  But, the problem with that is we may be punishing some men who are being responsible dads and doing their job.  I say go state by state finding these irresponsible dads, round 'em up by the herds (lassos may be used if necessary, heck go ahead and sing the song "rawhide" while you are gathering them up if it will make it go faster), and let them do work for the government and then the government can write a check for their work straight to the mother of their kids.  We aren't just talking about a certain demographic, only uneducated men, and dads with no skills.  This is happening with men who are of all races, educated and have skills and are capable of supporting their kids.  Kill two birds with one stone, get some work done for the government and use that hard earned money for the kids.  That's what most moms do.

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