Sunday, July 17, 2011

I Am So Blessed With My "Village"

     I have said so many times we, parents, are in this thing together.  Being a parent is the hardest job in the world, most rewarding, but the hardest at the same time.  We constantly lean on others whether we realize it or not.  If you are a dad and while your son is practicing ball you talk to other dads about skills and you in your head compare your son's progress to the progress of other boys.  Sometimes it isn't the competetive comparing as much as making sure our kids are on the right path.  Are they developing the way they are supposed to at the same rate as others their age is what we are looking for sometimes. 

     Moms do it all the time.  I think being women, we openly share more than men generally just because we start sharing before our kids get here.  We talk to other moms in the waiting rooms of our prenatal visits.  We want to see if our pregnancy is normal or not.  There are questions we ask other moms instead of our doctors because we don't want to look stupid, especially if we are a first time mom.

     Moms on the playground or just sitting outside of a ballet class, we constantly bounce off of each other our kids and if they are in line with other kids.  It is normal because that is sometimes our only gauge, but also because it helps when we know other parents have concerns too. 

     Some parents are worriers (did I spell that right?).  I fit in that category.  I worry about everything.  Some parents are more relaxed.  My sister is more relaxed.  She is a great mom, but where I worry about things that may or may not even happen, she takes things as they come.  Let me say it this way, I walked right behind my kids when they were learning to walk.  I wanted to catch them as soon as they fell.  My sister gives her kids a bit more room so if they fall they have a chance to pick themselves back up.  I wish I was more like her and not so panicky all the time.  (I don't know if I spelled that right either, I may be making up words.)  She panics when she is supposed to.  I don't like that I do worry too much, but maybe our parenting styles are given to us by God because that is what is needed for our children specifically.  Maybe I need to be the way I am for my kids, and she needs to be the way she is for her kids.

     I read an article this morning about a mom and how social media saved her son.  I just talked about how I think there are good points and bad points.  This definitely falls in the good.  I put pictures of my kids on facebook and on here.  I, with my sister and brother's permission, put pictures of my nieces and nephews here also.  I wasn't sure in the beginning of this blog whether I should or not.  I worried (again!) about the safety issues.  I looked at other mom blogs and most of them have pictures of their kids.  Some use real names, some don't.  I wanted to put pictures on here because pretty much all I talk about is family and for the readers that don't know us personally, I feel like the pictures are important.  We are living in a world where we have to think about safety all the time, not just when we put our kids' faces on the internet.  We have cell phones with cameras where someone else can take pictures of our kids and put them anywhere without us knowing.

     This article is a really good positive point to having social media at your fingertips.  We parents stay so busy and are multitasking all day long that sometimes our communication with other parents is through facebook and other social methods.  I feel like we are so much more likely to "butt in" on facebook and say something to another parent that we feel is important.  This mom and her child are so blessed that others jumped into the facebook conversation.

     I don't normally quote Hillary Clinton, but I totally agree that it takes a village to raise a child.  I am so blessed that my village is full of wonderful family and friends!  It is scary enough raising kids, but as a single mom I rely on anyone who is willing to help me!  I think the best and sweetest 3 words a parent can hear, besides "I love you" from your kids of course, is "You're not alone!"

Matthew 18 1-6

     1 At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, "Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?"
2  He called a little child and had him stand among them.  3 And he said:  "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.  4 Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven."  5 And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me.  6 But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea."

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